Skool Blog Diary 4

Is it weird to fall asleep during a lab class?

Is it OK to hate your major so much that you wish you could drop out?

It's only been a week and I can't wait any longer. I was sincerely thinking what would happen if I took off this semester and really focused on my writing, then come back on the fall.

I thought about some pros and cons to taking a leave of absence.

PROS

1. I could focus on getting different work opportunities and building my profile, which I haven't yet. Using this blog, I'll try to publish my writing on different platforms.
2. I could work more. Get them extra hours when I need them. I really want to buy a DSLR camera and Wacom tablet to start my creative plan. I could save the money I make it instead of using it everyday on hot chocolate and donuts.  I also have to pay for my classes myself with the help of financial aid, so I can save up for those.
3. I commute, so I couldn't enjoy good healthy meals from home. I somehow made it a habit to order a medium sized hot chocolate with whipped cream and a jelly donut everyday. I would be rather in a sugar coma all day suppressing my unhappiness than making something nice from home  can enjoy free homemade meals at home. Now I promised myself to really reduce the amount of sugar, diary, and bread I ingest.
4. I could devote some time to working out and getting back in shape. My self-confidence has gone down mainly due to my lack of satisfaction with my body. I really have to create a work-out schedule that I can stick with.
5. I love to sleep in and I love to sleep late. I can stay up and catch up on sleep, because I know that during the semester, especially if I have 8:00 am classes, I can't sleep the way I have to in order to survive in college.
6. I could FINALLY take the road test for my drivers licence and quit taking the stupid bus. 
7. Since I make more time, I can do the salat more.

CONS

1. I'm a little nervous that one semester will be lost. I'm afraid I'll never be able to graduate if I keep going like this. It'll be some extra time to wait and work hard. Really, I'm not a hard working person if I don't like what I'm doing. I don't put the effort into things I know I should to succeed in because ultimately I set myself up to fail.
2. I might not even do any of the things I plan to. I can be a very unmotivated person. I found I  have to trick myself to make a change and so suddenly it becomes a habit. If I skip or miss one day, I go back to being the same.

I've done pretty well so far, but I want to do better.

Stay tuned for Skool Blog Diary 4: Shocking or not so shocking news.

My Thoughts on B.A.P Himchan's V-app.

I always wondered what's going on in celebrities' heads. How can they so focused while begging themselves not to make another mistake?

I was starting thinking about this again after Himchan's swear word accident during the V-app, the same that Daehyun made with Youngjae and Jongup during their reality show tour. And when I start thinking about something, I have to come to a conclusion so I can sleep better at night.

So...I went back to the B.A.P's V app that I caught late, because if you wait a day or three, the app usually translates their words as subtitles. Daehyun's bias wrecker face welcomed us, explaining that they were at their jacket album photo-shoot. He teased us like he always does by not showing the member's new hairstyles in exchange for hearts. Himchan is one of my many biases in B.A.P. He already showed his blond hair on the Idol Olympics, so he allowed himself to be filmed first after Yongguk. Himchan was reading the comments, but he accidentally stumbled on a bad word and read it aloud. I've noticed that Himchan, like many other people who have a tendency to want to be the center of attention, they admit their mistake to everyone and profusely and thoroughly apologize. He firmly said to his fans not to say such words like that in the comments. But I just felt bad for him because I know how much he loves his fans and "I said something bad in front of the people I love". It was a true mistake and I forgive him as a fan. He's my cute awkward diva.

I only wish he would have handled it like Daehyun, Youngjae, and Jongup: realized their mistake, looked at each other abruptly and announce the cancellation of the show. then find the person who sent to rude comment and scolded them live. Himchan and Daehyun did that too but instead of moving on, Himchan kept beating himself over it.

I hope there won't be a next time, but if there is, I hope they make the fans feel very bad (like not reading the comments because certain fans are writing bad words), and if the fans care that much, they'll stop.

I don't know any Korean bad words, I know that there are words through FTISLAND's reality show, Coming Out. Himchan is one of those people in a group that is always in some kind of trouble because their mouths are so free (like Rap monster, Minhyuk, Zico).

There are bad words in Somali I don't even know. My parents censored them from me. However, like me, most Somali people like to say the first English bad word that's on their mind. I have accidentally sworn in front of my family, thinking I was having in a normal conversation to the friend in my head.

For the people who will eventually join my imaginary "company", I want them to feel free but keep it cute of the young fans I want us to cultivate. I want to be free enough to say things when time is appropriate, but I don't want to create a place that it strewn with bad words and gross thoughts like SourceFed or as PC as today's Saturday morning programs. I want it to be comfortable but restrained.

I hope that Himchan forgives himself quickly and comes back strong.

Weird Maknaes

I was really trying to decide who was the weirdest, but I can't. They are all weird.
I enjoy people who can be weird with me.

First of all, Jungkook (Kookie) from BTS.



H.O from MADTOWN.



P.O from Block B.



Yibo from UNIQ.



I.M and Jooheon from MONSTA X.



Jude from BIGSTAR.






Can you pick one???

Images Credits: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6

10 Favorite Disney Soundtracks

Disney movies are the butter to my jam. I don't know what that means, but like everybody in the world ever, Disney was my childhood.

I can't pick 10 Top or Favorite Disney Songs. Are you trying to kill me?

Instead, I went with my favorite soundtracks, the most recognizable songs to me, and maybe we'll karaoke all of the songs together later.

Here Goes:

1. The Lion King - "Hakuna Matata"

2. Mulan - "Be A Man" 

3. Oliver and Company - "Why should I Worry?" 

4. Aladdin - "One Jump" 

5. Tarzan - "Strangers Like Me" 

6. Brother Bear  - "Welcome"

7. Hercules  - "The Gospel Truth"

8. The Jungle Book  - The Bare Necessities" 

9. The Little Mermaid - "Under The Sea"

10. Mary Poppins - "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious"

Some people don't know all of these songs by heart. If you are one of those people that do, we will be great friends.


images: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10

My Favorite Actors List

This is a list of actors I always go back to because their films guarantee me a good time.

Here, I chose my favorite movies, movies I've disliked or was disappointed in, my favorite lines, and moments.

Shah Rukh Khan



Best Movie: Duplicate, Phir Bi Dil Hai Hindustani, Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, Baadshah, DDLJ
Worst Movie: Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa, Devdas
Memorable Line: "Mai To Hoon Pagal"  dance sequence - Baadshah
Memorable Moment: All of DDLJ. Raj grows up from a boy without responsibilities into the most romantic determined man, fighting claim his true love from her strict father. This was SRK at his finest.

Eddie Murphy



Best Movie: Showtime, Shrek, Dr. Dolittle series, The Nutty Professor series
Worst Movie: Bowfinger, Norbit
Memorable Line: "And in the morning, I'm making waffles!" - Shrek
Memorable Moment: His laugh when delivered unexpectedly kills me.

Jim Carrey



Best Movie: The Mask, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, Bruce Almighty, Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events
Worst Movie: The Incredible Burt Wonderstone, A Christmas Carol
Memorable Line: "It's party time. P. A. R. T. Y? Because I gotta!" - The Mask
Memorable Moment: The Bruce Almighty bedroom scene. Watch the movie again and revel at the effect.

Johnny Depp



Best Movie: Pirates of the Caribbean, Corpse Bride, The Lone Ranger
Worst Movie: Dark Shadows, The Rum Diary, Mortdecai
Memorable Line: "Have I gone mad?" - Alice In Wonderland. It just explains Johnny Depp's character choices.
Memorable Moment: When we first meet Jack Sparrow and we wonder if he really is the main character of the movie.

*Creeping: Ryan Reynolds

I don't know why, but I have watched more of Ryan Reynolds than I should have. He is a remarkable actor who really know how to be funny, dramatic, and engaging at the some time, like my old friends.



Best Movie: The Voices, The Proposal, R.I.P.D.
Worst Movie: Green Lantern
Upcoming Movie I want to watch: Deadpool


Image Credits: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Early Day, Late Night

An Asma Original from Canva.com

Skool Blog Diary 3

I found a new group called The Legend today. I was going to start a reaction channel on YouTube. and I was thinking about making this my first reaction. But I couldn't wait and watched it anyway.

I don't know what I was excepting, but I was very judgmental. I completely shut their song out of my head. However, when I saw the YouTuber reactions to the music video and they strongly recommended the group to their viewers to check them out.

So, I gave them a shot, watched their old music videos and interviews, and I realized they sang really well, were talented and really cute. The new song "Crush On You" is really good too. I already have it on my phone and I've been replaying it all day. I think I fell in love.

I need to trust my instinct. I knew I was going to like them after I watched their trailer. Their visuals and the beat were really my style. I just would give them a chance. I don't know what I was thinking. If I had filmed it, it would have been a really dull reaction.

Lesson Learned Today: Stop being judgmental over new music for artists you don't know yet. I do this all time that I sometimes forget to share my love.

Additional Notes:

*I caught B.A.P's sudden V app early in the morning. They looked really good. Himchan in the blond hair. Jongup had his natural hair back - no more silver. I was also struck by how happy and cute Yongguk look, too. Daehyun showed up for a little bit.

*I've been very quiet today and silently seething at how uncool I really am. I must succumb to my embarrassing qualities.

*I really do want to start a react channel or a channel in general to start learning how to make and edit videos. I have to get at least 1 hour of complete alone time so I can concentrate.

Asma

Skool Blog Diary 2

1/20/16

Still getting used to school.

I missed the bus I was supposed to take to school. 

Luckily, there was a taxi at the bus stop and I took it. 

I felt bad because I couldn't pay him the full amount he asked for. 

My parents will never know that I rode a taxi by myself for the first time. 

Today, I had molecular biology. I thought Allah has playing a sick joke on me. "Why is he being so nice to me?" I thought. But as expected, the teacher seemed nervous, small in front of the class, and running out of breath. She wasn't prepared at all. I started staring at the clock and falling asleep in between checking. 

Almost fell asleep on the bus, too. So slow and soothing. 

I have so much homework already. I seriously considering dropping out. I have zero money to buy books or pay for the rest of my tuition. I can't go to the job fair to look for a new job because I have to work at my actual job. 

Watched iKON and BAP's V apps.

I went to my sister's school band concert. I played like I didn't want to go. But I went to support her. Because nobody else could or would go. I wanted to play an intrude meant when I was little and now the opportunity was given to her. You have to support kids and their creative activities. It helps them develop. I've been stunted. I have no one to blame because I didn't even have the backbone to stand up for myself chasing after my art. 

Note: I need to stop giving people money. No. Don't even think about asking. 

*This is my space for complaining since I don't have a human recording device. Therefore, I feel like I'm heard and understood after I've condense my thoughts. Please don't mind.

Asma. 

Skool Blog Diary 1

First Day of School: Spring 2016

I woke up at 6 am to get to an 8 am Organic Chemistry II class in the freezing cold with a new coat I have to break in. I'm scared for this semester because I failed Org Chem I with a big fat F.

I had to wait four hours for the next class. I watched Monsta X's Right Now Ep, 3 on 1theK in the library. Then I watched B.A.P's Killer/Healing Camping trip.

The next class was Molecular Biology. Suddenly, the teacher comes in looking like one of those white people that say they love sharks and parasites are their best friends. One of my friends from middle school was in my class. When the teacher decided to play introduction games (which I hate), we were sat in front of each other. We started talking and he is a chemistry major and his favorite class was glassblowing. I don't really care. I just have to remember for the next class, because she'll ask. The glassblowing class seems cool. I wish I took more classes that I liked.

Another guy in class has the name Khalid and his family is from Jordan. I said to the class I could pronounce his name better. "Kh"alid.

"She's the only one who can call me that," he said.

Proving again that when I meet people for the first time, I am the most charming, funny, together person. After that, there is no follow up game. There is nothing that insures I'll keep being charming, funny or together. Why do I have to learn names if I'll ever see these people again? I don't want to get to know them or remember their names because I forget them the moment I meet them. Heartless. I know.

Honestly, if all goes well, this will be my last year as a college student. I've 7-8 classes left. Spring semester I'm taking four class, in the summer I hope to take two, the fall maybe three.

I've already spin into my old habits: Eating Dunking Donuts (a hot chocolate, chocolate chip muffin, and a jelly donut!), accidentally overpaying for the bus, watching videos during long break periods when I should start homework.

I really enjoyed myself during break: sleeping in late, making food for myself, watching videos, laughing, starting this blog, fangirling, dreaming, and writing.

February is already a long month, what will I do?

P.S. At work, I made a suggestion that give me the suggestion never to give suggestions. When I create my own agency/company, my employees can make all the suggestions they want and I will hear them out.

Asma

Inner Thoughts

You tried so hard
And lived so long;
To think you own the world when you’re really living in another.

- Asma

random poem

We looked up and down, 

Back and forth,

Turned around. 

Can't see our lives passing by.

Your eyes

Can't look straight.

Why are you like that?

I'm in the clouds,

I'm floating. 

Hold me down.

What's making me do this?

Is it love's swell?

Can you prove it?

- by Asma

iKON + Jim Carrey = my stolen heart

The fact that iKON loves Jim Carrey as much as I do makes them that much more lovable. 

Examples #1: The song title, Dumb and Dumber.




Examples #2: Night at the Roxbury.

Jinhwan's face.

Examples #3: Mr. Popper's Penguins.

 

Finally, I'll end with the two scenes I like the best:

Watch Psy's DADDY and you'll understand.

I laughed out loud at the cuteness.

Images: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8

People I want to have a comeback in American Music

There are many American artists I want to come back. I wonder if they want to comeback, too. If some of them don't want to, that's OK. I'm just stating my own wishes and what I hope they would when they come back with. 

1. I want to hear a new full John Mayer album. I would love to hear him doing some jazzy Cabaret music with a nice beat in a suit, slicked back hair, moving his mouth the way he does. That would be awesome.

Look at this man!

2. Paramore, darlings, where have you been? I mean, I know you have been promoting but it's been three years. From Paramore, I am looking for a story-line like Fall Out Boy's Save Rock and Roll album (a thing of beauty). Something like "The Only Exception" and "Brick by Brick" (plus many more) with more wordplay in their lyrics.

3. All American Rejects. Dropping a single for a movie is good and all, but seriously I need more. Fulfill my dreams!!! It's a good song, though.

Images: 1, 2

Groups I have gotten recently into #1

In order:

They are all really talented and super cute.

Romeo's Target

BIGSTAR's Full Moonshine or Moonlight Sonata cute dance practice

I haven't probably slept in three days because I've stayed up watching all of their English Subbed videos.

About me...

I wanted to tell you guys a little about myself. So...I am using the standard test questions KPop stars answer. I'll have some more detailed facts about myself soon.

Here goes...

Birthday?
August 26. I am a Virgo. The Virgo personality fits me well.

Nickname?
Asma jodhe (small or little Asma), Ama (from my sister when she was little)

A physical feature you are proud of?
My thick ankles, my eye shape, and my muscular shoulders.

In this book, the main character has thick ankles.

The thing you like hearing the most?
"Good job!"

The thing you hate hearing the most?
Being criticized in any way. I haven't learned not to take it personally yet.

Your ideal type?
A man who works hard, gorgeous and funny, understands me without me directly saying anything.

The thing you worry about the most lately?
Time running away from me and finishing my bachelor's degree.

The thing you are most confident about?
Making people laugh, my quick thinking and understanding of situations

Finally, say something to yourself.
Asma, I know you'll be where you want to be someday. Keep writing, working hard, and I will keep supporting you.

I hope you, whoever you are, will stay with me as I share my personality, thoughts, and opinions through this blog and other mediums.

Thank you. 

A moment to talk about K'NAAN.

K'naan (Keynaan Cabdi Warsame) is a Somali-born, Canadian-raised poet, rapper, singer, and songwriter. His family immigrated to Toronto during the Somali Civil War. He debuted his first album in 2004, but I first heard him in his second album with the song "Soobax" around 2008 or 2009. I saw the the music video with my family, wondering who is this skinny Somali guy going in. He swore. We were shocked but we kept watching. Out of curiosity, I researched him and watch "The Dusty Foot Philosopher" & "ABC's" with Chubb Rock. And oh, how I danced, but also was memorized by the lyrics and their power to make people think twice.

I wanted to go through the songs I like from him the most and describe how they felt to me.

Top 20 K songs I listened to Fall 2015.

I dove into Korean music and entertainment starting October this year and I decided to a list of Korean pop, R&B, and hip-hop I had on repeat. I made a list of songs that made my cry (I had a rough year) and which songs almost had me dancing at random bus stops.

7 Songs That Made Me Cry:

BTS "Butterfly" (short piano version)
BTS "I Need You"
RTS "Run" (the music video itself)
iKON "Airplane"
iKON "Apology"
Monsta X "Amen"
Winner "Empty"

13 Songs That Were on Repeat:

BTS "Dope"
BTS "Fun Boys"
Epix High "Born Hater" (feat. Beenzino, Verbal Jint, B.I, Mino, and Bobby)
EXO "Love Me Right"
GD&T.O.P "ZUTTER"
GOT7 "Tic Tic Toc"
iKON "Anthem" (B.I&Bobby)
Jay Park "Mommae"
Madtown "OMGT"
Monsta X "Trespass"
Seventeen "Mansae"
Vixx "Chained Up"
Zico "Eureka" (feat. Zion T)

2 Honorable Mentions:

Jay Park's "Solo" (feat. Hoody) and "My Last" (feat. Loco and GRAY)

Some songs are from 2014 because I was perusing through older catalogs and others are from early on the year. After three months of furiously listening to these songs, I have come to the conclusion that BTS is my bias group and Jimin is my ultimate bias. Monsta X is second with Wonho as my bias and then iKon is third. I haven't yet chosen a bias in iKON yet so I'll stick with leader B.I. I really these group and all of the artists I listened to. I've watched with such amazement at how much they have all grown musically and personally within the time they've had. I really look forward to what they have to offer in 2016. I also hope that they rest they deserve soon and come back with awesomer music. 

I cried when I watched "Annie".

Quvenzhané Wallis was so beautiful. Seriously. She was funny and quick. Taking me back to the various 90's child actors I liked so much. Wallis will become a great actress when she grows up and I can't wait to see her develop.

The story is similar to the original, with a few modern twists. It was a great script and the awesome visuals challenged the audience's exceptions and prejudices about getting into the movie. It was mesmerizing. The secondary characters, like the characters played by Jamie Foxx and Cameron Diaz, showed off Wallis's subtle command of her surroundings.

The songs were beautiful. They were Mary Poppins-esque, some fun and some sad and realistic. It was when she sang about herself being a orphan that I couldn't control my waterworks. The emotions were palpable.

The sentiment that I felt with this film was that it was a movie for black people who've wanted to see themselves on the big screen. Any negative comments were outweighed by the performances of Wallis and Foxx, who surprised me as well. 

Beyond the Lights

Watching “Beyond the Lights”, starring Nate Parker and Gugu Mbatha-Raw directed by Gina Prince-Bythewood, I got exactly what I wanted and exactly what I excepted: a beautiful love story between two people of color who are complex and going through their own shit before/while they fell head over heels.

Noni is a character that reflects the current sexual exploitation of female pop stars and the decline of personal integrity and free will. Noni’s mother (Minnie Driver) is her manager and lives for her duties. She accepts the exploitation of her daughter as a mode of business. She does not see Noni as a daughter, but as a client.

Kaz is the moral opposite of Noni. A police officer and aspiring politician for the city of Los Angeles, Kaz sees the world through a filtered lens of right and wrong. His father (Danny Glover) lives vicariously through his son, believing that Kaz can achieve the status that he did not have the opportunity to achieve.